Satire: A woman stole a used condom to impregnate herself in Nairobi.

By Ruzeki, Shadoww News 
December 28, 2024 

In the bustling city of Nairobi, a 26-year-old woman, Akoko (not her real name) won a child support battle against a 40-year-old man, Kasongo (not his real name), who she never slept with. 

Wondering how she got pregnant? Well, Akoko was 24 when she stole a used condom from a then 38-year-old man, Kasongo. 

The two lived as nextdoor neighbours in an unnamed estate in Ruiru. Kasongo is a bank teller who is unaware of deep lust his neighbour, Akoko, harbors for him. Akoko's feelings grew into a desperate yearning for connection with Kasongo. 

When it comes to women, Kasongo is that man who embrace the 'eat and run' tactic. Every day, he'll be seen with a different girl (mostly university students), he never recycle the same girl. 

One fateful morning, after twa twa twa all night, Kasongo was disposing off his used condoms in a garbage can 🗑️ outside his door. Akoko had been monitoring the bank teller's garbage can 🗑️ for the whole night. She immediately picked up the used condoms and went directly to her bed. 

She inserted the semen inside her vagina and became pregnant with a baby girl who is now 2-years-old. The man whose semen were used finds out 2 years later as he is contacted by child support department. 

During the child support hearing in one of the courts within Nairobi County, Akoko confessed that she never slept with Kasongo but that she impregnated herself with his sperm after accessing his used condoms from a garbage can🗑️. 

The paternity test were conducted and the Bank teller is the father. The court ordered him to pay the mother of the baby Ksh 1 million for the 2 years of his daughter's life he missed. 

Very unfair, so he appealed the court's decision but it was not overturned. Currently, he is faithfully fulfilling his new responsibility by paying the child support kitty of Ksh 20,000 per month. 

Meanwhile, Akoko has quit her hotel job and started a business with her newfound fortune, she has full custody of her baby whom she named after his father. 

—The END— 

This story is a satire😅🤫

My main message is around an instance of SPERM THEFT, also known as Forced fatherhood or imposed paternity, which occurs when a man becomes a father against his will or without his consent. 

It can include deception by a woman about her ability to get pregnant or use of contraceptives, birth control sabotage, paternity fraud and sexual assaults of males that result in pregnancy. 

Sperm theft or unauthorized use of sperm refers to a specific form of forced fatherhood in which a man's semen is used to impregnate a woman without his consent. 

Forced fatherhood is not illegal anywhere. Cases are usually reported in connection with disputes over child support. When the obligation to provide child support is challenged by men who allege that their sperm had been stolen or otherwise used to inseminate a woman without their consent, courts will typically enforce the doctrine of strict liability: i.e, a man is liable to support a child conceived with his sperm, irrespective of the circumstances of conception, including any criminal conduct on the part of the mother. 

In our story above, Kasongo's arguments of tort liability for fraud or emotional trauma inflicted by perpetrator (Akoko), did not hold up in a Nairobi Court. The Magistrate was reluctant to remedy such grievances. 

He ended up being punished with child support liability. He did not receive compensation for the unauthorized use of his biological fluids as he could not prove that he did not have sex with Akoko. 

Again, that story is a satire😅

However, it could literally happen to anyone, so it is advisable to flush your condoms down the toilet or take them away after sexual intercourse so that no woman can use your sperm to impregnate herself. 

I have seen a growing trend in the number of women tricking men into having a baby, usually by lying about contraception/ menstrual cycle... these women usually hope a child will smooth over issues in the relationship. If she wants to trap you, she might feel a baby will seal the deal. 

Many women get pregnant after lying about taking the emergency pills without telling her boyfriend, hoping he would marry her. In most cases, men will break off the relationship and move to other women. 

The Bible describes two cases in which a man is seduced by a woman under false pretences and becomes an unwitting sperm donor. These biblical women are sympathetic, and are shown acting for noble reasons; unlike modern women. 

—The account of Lot and his daughters (Genesis 19:30–38): 

Lot went up out of Zoar, and dwelt in a cave in the mountains; with his two daughters. The firstborn said unto the younger, Our father is old, and there is not a man in the earth to sleep with us. Let's make our father drunk and we will sleep with him; that we may preserve seeds of our father. They made their father drunk that night. The firstborn went in, and lay with her father; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. The next day, the firstborn said unto the younger, well, I slept last night with our father, let's make him drunk again tonight; so you can sleep with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. The younger daughter slept with him also. They both conceived by their father. 

—The account of Tamar and Judah ( Genesis 19:30–38): 

Tamar deceives her father-in-law, Judah, into having sex with her by pretending to be a prostitute. When Judah discovers that Tamar is pregnant he prepares to have her abducted and killed, but calls it off when he finds out that he is the father. As a result, the twins Perez and Zerah were conceived. 

Reported in some countries, are some cases where people steal sperm from famous men and sell it to women who want children sired by geniuses or rich guys. 

Enjoy!!! But, remember to dispose off your used condoms in a secure place😂🤣